Dr. Susan Rubin » parenting

Should We Be Re-thinking Education?

Dr. Susan Rubin — Sat, 18 Dec 2010 13:12:13 +0000

I wrote about the “Race to Nowhere” back in October when I first saw the movie. This film highlights the dark side of our over-achieving communities. While many of us move to suburbia for the excellent schools, sometimes its important to take a step back and ask some serious questions.

Are our kids over-worked and under-played? Are there too many tutors and travel teams? Has high school just become one big race to the “best college”?

What have we lost in this crazy busy race? Our health? Our happiness?

Schools across the country are screening this film. My town, Chappaqua, has gone whole hog: they’ve screened it multiple times to both parents and faculty. The PTA has even moderated two discussion sessions for parents. While I give kudos to my school district credit for screening the film to both parents and faculty multiple times and for allowing the space for the conversations afterwards, I wonder. Will this result in any meaningful change? Are we just preaching to the choir?

This fun, eye opening You Tube presentation by Sir Ken Robinson about changing educational paradigms caught my attention. These are the big questions we need to ponder in a changing world.

Picky Eaters and Labelling

Dr. Susan Rubin — Thu, 14 Oct 2010 21:09:25 +0000

My Picky Eater E-book

I recently became involved in an interesting online conversation about the word “picky eater” with some mommy bloggers. Christina Le Beau who has a blog, SpoonFed. wrote a recent post that makes the argument that labeling kids becomes a crutch for parents and sets up a self-fulfilling prophecy. Plus it minimizes the very real food issues that some kids do have (allergies, sensory issues, etc.).

I’ve always felt that language is really important. I’ve written loads about how the food industry runs the show by controlling the language. I believe strongly that labels are for jars, not people.

It’s probably not a good idea to label a child as a picky eater. I’ve had more than my share of both personal and professional experience with kids of all ages who are not adventurous when it comes to food. I’ve written a great little E-Book called Winning the Picky Eater War……maybe I need to look at changing that title.

Let’s talk personal here. I’m the mom of three amazing and beautiful daughters, ages 20, 18 and 13. The two older gals could almost be considered Foodies. They love to eat, they love to cook. But my 13 year old continues to give me a run for the money. While I’ve declared victory from time to time and she does eat way more veggies than she used to, I would still classify her on the picky side.

Sadly, compared to other kids her age, she IS more adventurous than many. That is the really scary piece that my mommy blogger friends might not realize. Picky eating behaviors, or whatever we should be calling it, are now extending beyond the toddler years into the tween, teen and even college age. My older daughters tell me stories of the peers who eat nothing but junk. Imagine a 20 year old ordering pasta with butter, how crazy is that? What do you call that? Picky? Dare I say “stupid”? What these kids are missing out on is huge. There is a whole wide world out there filled with amazing, delicious food.

This is one of the reasons she is accompanying me and my husband to Italy this week. There aren’t any chicken nuggets in Italy, right? She’ll experience a wonderful “slow” food culture first hand. We’re even going to take a full day cooking class in Florence.

In addition to the art, the history and the language, I hope my daughter finds herself inspired to expand her palate while on this trip. Stay tuned for more photos and recipes. My plane leaves in less than an hour!

Ciao!

No Longer a Teenager

Dr. Susan Rubin — Tue, 10 Aug 2010 12:48:41 +0000

It’s hard to believe that 20 years ago, I was birthing my first kid into the world. As of today, Miss Melanie Elizabeth Rubin is no longer a teenager.

I don’t want to brag, but I must say she’s grown into a strong and healthy young lady who appreciates real food. Part of that stems from back when she was 9 and she became violently ill after eating McDonalds. Part of it is a result of both her mom and dad spending extra time and money to buy, prepare and eat real food as a family.

Being a summer baby, Mel had numerous backyard birthday parties. Many included water slides, sprinklers and water balloons. This year, for her birthday, she’ll be having some friends over to eat and celebrate on the backyard trampoline. Instead of water fun, she’s set up loads of candles and Tiki torches to light up the backyard.

As for food, she whipped up a menu just the other day that will keep both her parents cooking.

Melanie’s Birthday BarBQ Menu

Grilled Chicken Thighs with Honey Mustard Sauce

Corn on the Cob

Roasted Red Pepper Hummus

Black Bean, Corn & Red Pepper Salad

Chocolate Wafer Refrigerator Cake

I’ll post recipes later. Right now, I’ve got work to do!

Coming in at 2nd Place….

Dr. Susan Rubin — Fri, 16 Apr 2010 14:37:27 +0000

Goldfish crackers. They lost out to Chicken Nuggets which came in first place. What sort of contest would chicken nuggets beat goldfish crackers, you ask?

Time Magazine’s List of Nine Kid’s Foods to Avoid.

You’ll find them in most pre-schools and kindergarden classes. They come in “convenient” little bags for lunches; “a tasty and smart treat” according to their marketing info. Dieticians recommend their “whole grain goodness” and their 100 calorie packs. They now come in a rainbow of colors and also “flavor blasted” varieties.

How come they ended up on this list of Kids Foods to Avoid? Because according to the Center for Science in the Public Interest, they are “swimming in salt”.

I’ve been leading the crusade against goldfish for years. In my workshops with teachers and parents of toddlers, I warn them that Goldfish can act as a “gateway drug”. So easy, convenient and seemingly not unhealthy, they get our kids started eating “edible foodlike products” that have no connection to real food. That satisfying crunch sets them up for things like Doritoes and Cheetoes in the years to come. Why not give them a healthy orange crunchy food like carrot strips instead? It only takes a few minutes to peel and slice a carrot or two. Your kid can use a peeler and help you to do it!

In my opinion, Goldfish have gotten even creepier now that they are rainbow colored and “flavor blasted”. Those colors were never proven safe for your kids. Flavor blasted can only mean one thing in my book: MSG. Ingredients include Hydrolyzed Wheat Gluten, Enzyme Modified Cheese, Autolyzed Wheat Extract, and Disodium Guanylate. What the heck is all that?? The Truth in Labeling folks will tell you that Autolyzed Wheat Extract is a fancy word for MSG.

Bottom line: feed your kids real food, not goldfish.

Parenting can be humbling!

Dr. Susan Rubin — Sun, 04 Nov 2007 10:29:00 +0000

We all have been or will be humbled by this little creature at some point in our lives as parents. Lice. The most democratic of pests, lice hit all socio-economic groups. Some of the best schools and cleanest scalps have ended up invested with this little critter.

The first response of panicked parents can often be to go the “shock and awe” route with heavy artillery. But the lice have built up a resistance to pesticides and there are serious health concerns about putting dangerous chemicals onto our kids scalps.

The scalp has many blood vessels that are close to the skin, making it easy for toxic substances to be absorbed directly into the blood stream. To make matters worse, children have a less mature immune system to protect them and other enzyme systems to detoxify these chemicals.

People with asthma can have very severe reactions to pesticides. They can have problems at low levels of exposure that have no apparent effect on people without these conditions, especially children. Pesticide exposure can aggravate existing health conditions. Anyone who is already ill, has chronic disease or is taking daily medication can be more at risk from exposure.

There are two main pesticides used in most head lice products available today: lindane and pyrethrins.

For many years, lindane (Kwell), an organochlorine pesticide available only by prescription, was the treatment of choice for head lice. It is still recommended by many medical personnel who have not taken the time to acquaint themselves with its potential health hazards to humans.
Lindane is absorbed through the skin and into the blood stream. Once absorbed, it can be carried throughout the body to the tissue (mainly fat) and organs. Due to its toxicity and lack of effectiveness, it should not be used under any circumstance.
About 9% of each lindane dose is absorbed through the skin. It is 10 times more soluble in brain tissue than in blood. Routine administration to children and geriatric patients has led to neurotoxic disorders. Lindane is highly carcinogenic in rats and mice and can cause aplastic anemia, a precursor or leukemia, and other blood disorders.

Pyrethrum and pyrethrins (found in Nix, Rid, Clear, Pronto) are pesticides made from flowers (a type of chrysanthemum). Synthetic pyrethroids (permethrins) are chemical imitations of these natural products. Synergists are chemicals added to increase their killing power.
Any pesticide can theoretically cause allergic reactions, although some are more likely than others. Products made from a member in this family of pesticides are likely to cause allergic reactions, particularly for people with allergies, asthma or chemical sensitivities.

I learned years back from my wise “old school” pediatrician that a nice jar of mayonaise works wonders. Lice can be killed quickly, easily, cheaply and safely with mayonnaise. Simply get a new jar of mayonnaise (not Miracle Whip) from your kitchen shelf or at the grocery store. (Don’t grab one from the refrigerator, as it will be way too cold.) Grab a handful (or several) and cover all of you child’s hair, being sure to get behind the ears and down the neck a little. You can cover this with a plastic shower cap to keep the mayonnaise from dripping or getting onto your furniture. Leave the mayonnaise on for two hours to smother the lice and developed eggs. Then, remove the shower cap and throw it away, both of you wash your hands good with soap, and shampoo the hair thoroughly. It may take two or more shampoos to get the hair clean.

If you don’t trust the mayonnaise to smother the lice, you can make a natural lice shampoo to kill the lice but not poison your child. Here’s the recipe:
Start with five teaspoons of Olive oil or Coconut oil.
Add five drops of each of these essential oils:
Tea tree

Rosemary

Lavender

Peppermint

Eucalyptus

Add a small amount of regular shampoo to the mixture, and put this all over the hair – all the way to the edges. Leave this on for an hour under a towel or tight-fitting shower cap to prevent drips. Rinse the hair, and shampoo the hair.

Olive oil and coconut oil kill lice by “dissolving” their exoskeletons, and other oils will not have the same effect.

Once you’ve either mayo’ed or herbally blasted your child’s head, it’s time for the real fun: nit picking. Nitpicking is essential. The mayonnaise or herbal shampoor may not kill the newest nits since the unborn lice inside may have not yet developed enough to need air yet. Use a special metal lice comb found in the drug stores.

When you think you are done, you want to use good lighting to check throughly the hair once it is dry. (The nits are much easier to see on dry hair.) Nits are very small and are kind of shiny at a certain angle. They are on the hair shaft itself, with the newest ones being just off the scalp and older ones being as much as an inch away from the scalp. You will have to check the hair by tiny sections, especially around the edges of the hair, at the neck, and behind the ears – although one could be anywhere. If you find any nits, you can pull them off with your fingernails, comb them off with the nit comb, or cut each hair off that contains a nit. Be sure to put each nit or hair into a bowl of vinegar or hot soapy water with ammonia added.

It’s the days and days of nit picking that will prevent a reinfestation in 2-3 weeks. There is nothing more humbling that starting all over with this annoying pest, so it’s best to become a good nit picker!

Nit picking takes time. The whole world has to slow down so that you can methodically comb thru every strand of hair on every kid in your house and remove every darn nit!. Pretend for a minute that you are the mama chimp (or pick your favorite primate) and you are sitting in the jungle with your baby monkeys lovingly and meticulously performing this routine maintenance.

Another way to pass away the nit picking time is to go the philosophical/ new age route and consider this a sign of some sort from the universe. The louse, like any other animal contains many symbolic meanings. It’s always fun to look up power animals/ animal totems on the Internet. This is what I found when I looked up the Louse:

Lice, as you know, are parasitic creatures. They require a host in order to exist.
When Lice come for a visit in our homes. Perhaps the universe is trying to tell us to let go of some pesky people or ideals in our lives.

Do you have many choices before you – and all of them may be “bugging” you? Nevertheless, you can take advantage of the Louse. Observe the beauty in its symbiotic relationship with its host. The Louse actually changes its DNA to accommodate that of its host – assuring a life-long relationship. This is a lesson of flexibility, and a message that we can work with our challenges rather than fight against them.
Perhaps it’s a message that we can learn to live with our decisions – that we can indeed make the best of things. Sometimes we need only to adapt in order to live in peace.
Furthermore, the Louse never takes more from its host than either can handle (for to do so would destroy its own livelihood). This is a message that we can all learn from. Sometimes when Lice show up it can indicate that we are either asking too much from our loved ones, or they are asking too much of us.

When we are being “sucked dry” by too many responsibilities, too many obligations, or torn in too many directions by well-meaning people, the Louse will come to our attention as a message to withdraw ourselves and resist being pulled into situations we do not wish for ourselves.

After all these years, I know that parenting is humbling. I think of lice as a sign to slow down and pay attention. Jump off the fast track if only for an afternoon. And wash those sheets and pillowcases. I hope this never happens to you, but it probably will.